twenty five + counting

yeesh. i can hardly believe i'm typing that.

twenty. five. days.

the time has gone by so fast. but so slowly, at the same time. i'm ready to be married. i could skip the getting married part right now. mainly because i am aching for a daily life that isn't packed with a trillion little decisions + detail upon detail to take care of. i want to go to work + come home + actually have an evening in which i have nothing planned, nothing on the to-do list, nothing spinning in the back of my mind, demanding attention from an already overly crammed brain. when i can sit on the front porch with a cup of tea + a book, listening to the sounds of the neighborhood... just me + the quiet.

and tim, of course. in this fantasy life, he would be sitting next to me with a book of his own, or working on something in the garage. near. comfortable. at home together.

don't get me wrong: i have loved nearly every second of our engagement. it's been so fun seeing all my ideas come to life. seeing God provide + astound us with His imagination + ingenuity. seeing my friends + family gather 'round in support + joy.

one of the projects i'm currently working on is my veil. i decided (perhaps a little optimistically) to make my own. it's going to be really simple -- just a drop veil (pics below). but i'm still a tad nervous about it. if anyone has suggestions about how to make it happen... feel free to leave comments.

in the meanwhile, keep on counting. i know i am!

things i love about tim

1) he loves kung fu.
2) he has mad guitar skills.
3) he can leap tall retaining walls in a single bound.
4) he is gentle + strong.
5) he is flippin' hilarious.
6) his beautiful hands.
7) the way he laughs at himself when he thinks he's being funny.
8) he has the grossest he said/she said ideas. ever.
9) his honesty + transparency.
10) the way he so intentionally loves me.
11) he doesn't like to do the same thing over + over.
12) he likes to eat the food i make + finishes what's left on my plate.
13) that he plants + grows flowers to give to me.
14) he is a safe driver. (i'm serious -- i LOVE this about him)
15) he makes plans + follows through.
16) the way he looks at me when he thinks i don't notice.
17) kids flock to him -- they know he's safe + that he's genuinely interested in each one of them.
18) he's genuinely interested in any person that's open + honest.
19) he likes parties. i hate them. but i love that he likes them.
20) his spikey handwriting.
21) the way his skin smells.
22) the sound of his heartbeat.
23) when he gets punchy late at night + says the most ridiculous things.
24) that there's no discomfort in the silence.
25) i can say anything to him. anything.

i'm going to stop now... because i don't want everyone to start gagging. but, gosh... i love that guy. i love him so much.

cake + dessert ideas

i must be hungry today... because all i can think about is what to have at our dessert smorgasbord.

i do want SOME healthy items...

but we definitely need candy.

i mean, this IS tim heaner's wedding.

mmm... snickerdoodles are my favorite cookie

courtesy of wedding warrior, mary nelson

cookies courtesy of wedding warriors

rachel heaner, robbie lewis, and many, many others

fresh apple pie

with grandma kools' crust recipe

you just can't beat it

trying to be healthy-ish

i can't wait to make my first

peach-blackberry trifle

yummmmm

round little brownies

with raspberries or mint

cheesecake courtesy of wedding warrior, emily short

this is called hummingbird cake

so good it makes you hum

courtesy of wedding warrior, rachel cushing

carrot cake is my favorite cake

coconut cake runs a close second

courtesy of wedding warrior, rachel cushing

ooey, gooey cream puffs

you'll need a napkin or three for these

flourless chocolate goodness

for all my gluten-free people

courtesy of wedding warrior

(and honor corps captain)

bridgitte showell

oh wow. i just can't wait to see all the sugared-up kiddos running around. tim will be chief amongst them.

only 39 days, my friends!

when i grow up...

the other day, i was chatting with one of my dearest friends about the kind of person i want to be. and then, the next day, i found this quote on one of my favorite blogs. it so perfectly mirrored the essence of my heart's desire that i literally gasped when i read it.

she had a face like she had been crushed, but somehow survived, and squeezed every drop of compassion from her pain and painted it on her cheeks. she moved softly, without presumption. one might think she was pliable - such softness carries weakness with it. her secret, though, was that her beautifully humble exterior hid a strength no one expected.

let it be me...